“How about 3 weeks instead?”

was what I was thinking after Jonathan Falco had just suggested something that sounded ridiculous to me, his suggestion? “How about you take a year off from dating?”. I had just broken up with my girlfriend after realizing me and her were not following God with our relationship. I knew I needed a break from dating, to get my relationship with God back on track, since half the reason my recent relationship had ended, fell squarely on my shoulders, as a result of me not following God like I should have. But a year-long break? It sounded CRAZY! A year? that’s 365 days, 8,760 hours, 525,600 minutes without a date, without a random kind letter, without being called a pet name (not that I um enjoy that or uh anything)!! I mean a week without dating? Piece of cake, even a month without dating would be very simple, but a year? Making the conscience decision to not pursue a relationship for a year?

After talking with Jonathan I knew I needed sometime to focus solely on God and to eliminate anything that could be a distraction and although the “no dating for a year” thing still sounded ridiculous I figured a month would be good, it was long but not tooo long. Well that month turned into two months, then to three, four, five, till all of a sudden I realized it was the middle of August and I was still single! At first it was very surprising, but in time I started to see the beauty of it. After eight months I saw a difference across the board in my life, in the songs I was writing, my quiet times with God, relationships with people. Gone was the pessimism I had been living in and gone was the thought that “I NEED a girlfriend”.

Now to clarify a few things, I’m not saying everyone HAS to take a year off from dating, nor am I saying that relationships are evil things and that they are all bad. What I am saying though, is make sure that you’re first priority in your love life, is with God. No guy, girl, acquaintance, or friend will ever come close to being as awesome as He is and their love, even at it’s best, will always pail sooooo much in comparison with His love. Secondly make sure you’re getting in the relationship for the right reasons. Even though Christians focus a lot of attention on not dating for un-pure sexual purposes, the same can be said for dating because “everyone else is dating”, or “I’m 20 and I’ve never dated”, or “well everyone says we should be dating..”, none of those reasons are valid reasons to date someone. Remember, that having thirty ex’s may sound cool to our friends or to our future children, but in reality that number shows that there’s at least 30 hearts that were hurt in some way.

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